What to Expect at Confession: A Guide to the Sacrament of Reconciliation

Confession, also called the Sacrament of Reconciliation or Penance, is a sacrament in which a Catholic confesses their sins to a priest and receives absolution. If you are preparing to go for the first time in a while, the short answer is: you do not need to memorise anything, you cannot shock the priest, and you are free to tell him it has been a long time. This guide walks through what actually happens, how to prepare, and how to find the schedule at St. Jude Catholic Church in Indianapolis.

What the Sacrament Is (and Is Not)

Reconciliation is not a performance or an interview you can fail. The Church understands it as an encounter with God's mercy, mediated through the priest. Two points follow from that:

  • You do not need perfect words. The priest is there to help you, and he will guide you if you get stuck.
  • The seal of confession is absolute. A priest may never reveal what he hears in confession, under any circumstance, even under threat of death. What you say stays between you, the priest, and God.

The Steps of the Rite, in Plain Language

The ordinary form is simpler than most people expect. It usually runs like this:

1. Preparation and the Sign of the Cross

You enter the confessional or reconciliation room, and the priest greets you. You begin with the Sign of the Cross. He may read a short passage from Scripture.

2. You Say How Long It Has Been

Something as simple as: "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been [X years/months] since my last confession." If it is your first confession, say so — the priest will walk you through it.

3. You Confess Your Sins

Name the sins you are aware of, in your own words. There is no required script. You are not obliged to give long explanations or background stories. If you are unsure whether something is a sin, say that too.

4. The Priest's Response

He may offer a brief word of counsel or encouragement. He then gives you a penance — usually a few prayers or a small act, such as praying an Our Father or a Hail Mary. The penance is not a punishment; it is a way of expressing sorrow and beginning again.

5. Act of Contrition

You express sorrow for your sins. You may use a traditional Act of Contrition, or say something in your own words, such as: "My God, I am sorry for my sins. I am sorry for offending you, and with your help I will do better." If you do not know a formal prayer, tell the priest — he will help you.

6. Absolution

The priest extends his hand and prays the words of absolution. This is the moment the sacrament is completed. You respond "Amen."

7. Dismissal and Penance

He dismisses you in peace. You then complete your penance, ideally soon afterwards, often in the church.

How to Prepare: The Examination of Conscience

Before you go, spend a few quiet minutes reviewing your life since your last confession. This is called an examination of conscience. It is not about scrupulously cataloguing every fault; it is about honest self-reflection.

A simple method:

  1. Ask for the Holy Spirit's help to see yourself truthfully.
  2. Review your relationships with God, with family and friends, and with your wider community.
  3. Note where you have fallen short — in honesty, patience, charity, purity, forgiveness, or care for the poor.
  4. Choose the things you will confess. You do not need to write a list, though some people find a short note helpful if they are nervous.

Many parishes, including St. Jude, provide printed examination-of-conscience sheets, often arranged by the Ten Commandments or by state in life. These are usually available near the confessional or from the parish office.

Common Worries, Addressed

"I haven't been in years and I've forgotten how it works." This is extremely common. Say so at the start, and the priest will guide you step by step.

"I don't know what to say." You can say exactly that. The priest can ask gentle questions to help you.

"I'm embarrassed." The priest has heard it all before and is bound by the seal. His role is mercy, not judgement.

"What if I cry or get emotional?" That is fine. Take your time.

"Can I go face-to-face or behind a screen?" Both are normally available. You may choose whichever helps you feel more at ease.

Confession for Children and First-Time Penitents

Children typically prepare for their first confession as part of sacramental preparation, often around the age of reason (roughly seven or eight) and usually before First Holy Communion. Parish and school programmes introduce the sacrament gently, with practice sessions and simple language. If you are an adult preparing for the first time, or returning after a long absence, parishes usually offer instruction and a warm welcome — ask the parish office.

Finding the Schedule at St. Jude Catholic Church

Confession times vary by parish and can change with the liturgical season, so the reliable approach is:

  1. Check the parish website's Mass and Confessions schedule page.
  2. Look at the current bulletin, which lists any changes for holy days and seasons.
  3. Check the parish calendar for special penance services, especially during Advent and Lent.
  4. If in doubt, phone the parish office and ask.

St. Jude also publishes information on parish programmes and sacraments, which can be a good starting point if you want to know how the parish handles preparation for children or adults.

A Short Checklist Before You Go

  • Choose a time from the published schedule.
  • Spend a few minutes on an examination of conscience.
  • Decide roughly what you want to say; a note is fine.
  • Arrive a little early and use the time to pray quietly.
  • Remember: you can ask the priest for help at any point.

The sacrament is meant to be a relief, not a hurdle. If you take one step — showing up — the rest can be worked out in the room.

allsaintsdallas.org
Official website of All Saints Catholic Community. Features include parish and school news, Mass and Confessions schedule, bulletins, parish and scho…
stjudeindy.org
St. Jude Catholic Church | Features include parish news, Mass and Confessions schedule, bulletins, parish calendar, descriptions of all parish progra…